The Art of Fighting Without Fighting

*SLAP*

I slept with your boyfriend, now you want me dead, yadda yadda yadda.

Oh, good. You're not clueless. I hope you made out your will.

I don't get it. Your boyfriend's been sleeping with the blonde sword chick for as long as anyone can remember and he's laid his hands on every girl who's been around him. I'll bet he's having a threesome with your sister and her servant RIGHT NOW. So why do you want *me* dead?

FUCK YOU!!

Wait... That worked?!?